So often life doesn’t go the way we planned. We all go through difficulties. We all get sick. Sometimes we end up in those unexpected places that are lonely, painful, and seemingly impossible to walk through alone. It’s easy to expect the people in our lives to come alongside us and help us out. But people are painfully unpredictable. You never really know how someone is going to respond to your trial. Are they going to be there for you or are they going to abandon you in your time of need? This has been on my mind lately. Take a minute to consider this question. How do you handle it when the people in your life let you down in your moment of need?
Truth or Dare
Be truthful now! What goes through your mind? How do you feel? Do your feelings get hurt? Do you get angry? Do you withdraw and decide that they’re not really your friends because they failed you?
Maybe you feel that your family doesn’t really love you because otherwise they would be doing more and they would be more supportive.
I’m just wondering if you’ve thought about this because it’s something I’ve dealt with through the years living with chronic illness. I was even surprised to find myself feeling this way when I was in the hospital recently. My initial response may have been, let’s just say, a bit fleshy! That is until God got ahold of my heart.
In reality, we are probably guilty of letting down those in our lives. There’s no way we can meet everyone’s needs and if we were to be brutally honest, you and I both have had the opportunity to help someone in our lives and we’ve chosen not to for one reason or another. It’s so important that we allow the Lord to help us in these situations. We need to live this out with incredible grace and forgiveness and to never let bitterness take root in our hearts. Hebrews 12:5
I think it’s a natural response to expect others to serve us or meet our needs somehow. Especially when we’re sick or hurting. After all, Jesus commands us to love and serve one another. That directive from the Lord is our personal responsibility to serve one another. It is not our responsibility to make sure others are fulfilling it. As believers, we should never look to others to meet our needs!
You read that right! The people in our lives are not supposed to meet our needs! Your husband is not supposed to meet your needs! Your family and friends aren’t and neither is your church! If you expect anyone other than the Lord to meet your needs then you should expect to be disappointed.If you expect anyone other than the Lord to meet your needs then you should expect to be disappointed. Click To Tweet
As I’ve taken my hurt to the Lord over the years I’ve come to believe that those lonely, dark, scary times are actually purposed and anointed by God.
Our True Help
You see, so often we look to others to meet our needs and we forget to go to God. We try to solve our problems by searching for the perfect solution. We try to heal our illnesses by finding the best doctor or the magic bullet treatment protocol. We strive to make things happen in our own strength.
We expect people to come to our rescue and then we get angry or hurt when they don’t. Guess what else happens? We miss out on something incredible. Someone absolutely magnificent!
Too Noisy to Hear God
We miss out on going into the deeper places of intimacy with God. We miss out on seeing God move mountains and heal diseases. We miss out on experiencing God’s provision. He will meet our every need when we’re seeking Him and bringing them to him.
There’s so much noise around us and sometimes that noise is within us. It’s loud and relentless. It’s distracting. Every day there are so many things fighting for our attention. We’ve constantly pulled away from the things that really matter. We oftentimes can’t hear that still small voice of God calling out to us. He’s calling us to come to him and to sit with him. He wants us to bring our anxieties, our needs and all of our troubles. God wants to take care of us.
God Meets Your Needs
I’ve found that if you allow those dark, scary, and lonely times to draw you closer to God you will experience Him in a way that you never will otherwise! Because God does a mighty work in those who seek Him. He says when you seek Him you will find Him.
- He lifts your downcast head. Psalm 3:3
- He draws you close when you’re lonely. James 4:8
- He heals you when you’re sick and have no other options but to trust Him fully! Psalm 103:3
- He comforts you when you are hurting and grieving. 2 Corinthians 1:3
- He is faithful. 2 Thessalonians 3:3
- He will never leave nor forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6
- He cares for you and calls you His child. 1 John 3:1
- He gives you the peace that surpasses all understanding when we put our burdens at His feet through prayer. Philippians 4:7
- He works all things, yes even the unimaginable things, for good for those who love Him. Romans 8:28
- He loves you with an everlasting love. Jeremiah 31:3
When we put our trust in the doctors we forget the Great Physician. When we look to people we push aside the lover of our soul.
When we get angry or hurt because people let us down, we don’t recognize that the place we are in is exactly where God is leading us so that it is just us and Him. No distractions. He will get all the glory when lay down our burdens at His feet no matter how small or large.
I have experienced God’s presence and provision so often during our long battle with Lyme disease. I’ve also experienced the loneliness and hurt when I sought out my help from those around me.
Recently, when I was in the hospital waiting for surgery I really longed for someone to come sit with and pray with me but no one came. My room was quiet and I felt God calling me to come to the deeper places with him. I would have missed that if I wasn’t alone and scared. After I spent time with him the hospital chaplain came into my room. He was so kind. He spoke God’s word to me, encouraged me and prayed with me. God sent someone after he sent himself.
God wants to show you his true character. He longs to be your only provider. Will you let him? He waits patiently to be your loving Father. Will you run to him? He wants to cover you with his protective wings. Will you bow down? He wants to save you and redeem you. Will you surrender?
Don’t Miss Him
So often we want to be taken out of our difficult trial yet if we are we would miss Him! We miss Him when we expect others to meet our needs. He will transform your heart when you come to Him. He will make you so much stronger and will build your trust in him in a way that you cannot get any other way. When I think of being in the Holy of Holies, I think of the times when it’s been just me and God!
Is it possible that the people in our lives let us down because God wants our attention? He wants us to trust him and worship him in our valleys? I would encourage you to make it a consistent practice of going to God with open hands and taking every need and desire to Him. It will require faith, trust, and patience but I promise you, he will never fail you!
“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.
He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for He is with me;
His rod and His staff, they comfort me.
He prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
He anoints my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever.”
Psalms 23:2-6 ESV